Copyright © 2007 by William R. Mistele. All rights reserved.
Cosmic Letter A, Part II
Three sense concentrations
By concentrating on a color, sound, and elemental sensation, an energy field is created out of nothing. This energy field composes the substance of a cosmic letter. The three sense concentrations that create the cosmic letters take on slightly different qualities according to the plane you are working on.
On the akashic plane, the cosmic letter A’s sensation involves the air element. This is a sense of weightlessness. But this is not like floating in the air. On this level, it is a sense of being without gravity or attractions exerting any influence or pull.
Any disturbance is automatically balanced. Any force neutralized. Since I often focus on issues involving international justice, the implication for human endeavor is that any imbalance of power or abuse of power is neutralized by the presence of this energy which is cosmic in nature.
The note of “G” has the qualities of being open and vast. It underlies the air sensation and color supporting and amplifying them.
The color of light blue takes on the vibration of the mind as having no end. It is everywhere.
If we could refer to heaven as having a quality of harmony, this would be it. The letter A is the omniscience of Divine Providence. It is feeling divine in terms of harmony, balance, being at ease, clarity, and open infinite light. It is detached and yet full of understanding of whatever it focuses upon.
To work successfully with the akashic level of the cosmic letters, at some point you have to identify with the energy and awareness. You take on the particular letter’s qualities. You embody Divine Providence in one of its many aspects. You have to put off your human form. You become a vast, boundless expanse of blue light in your awareness.
Like I say, there are no points awarded to the timid. You have to make an effort. There is no one guarding these cosmic gates to wisdom. They are standing wide open. Simply pass through and experience Divine Providence in terms of its awareness and its perceptions.
In this regard, you say to yourself, “I am perfect wisdom, all knowledge, and perfect understanding. I am absolute freedom. I am the lawful order of the universe. Nothing is hidden. There is no purpose in the universe that is not revealed to me.
“I see the solution to any problem, the resolution of every conflict. I understand the original purposes underlying creation. I embody the harmony of the universe.
“I am freedom, that is, boundless, infinite light—and I am the wisdom that leads every path to perfection.”
The voice of Divine Providence: “Find me in your heart, set sail on this sea of light, explore the depths beyond thought from which all knowledge arises, let your eyes see as the blue sky sees, let your mind be as vast as the starry night, and you discover not me but your own divinity.”
Take a moment to imagine a creator saying to a small and elite group of the lords of creation to whom he assigns the task of fulfilling his will to create the universe.
He says, “My purposes require me to put a lot of power and desire into the created universe. So in order to maintain harmony and balance, I am offering you this state of awareness. Keep it close at hand at all times so you don’t screw up and if you do make mistakes just place your mind in this state and you will understand how to get back to the plan.”
I am putting my mind into this energy in order to experience and describe it. It would take a lot of work over years to embody this as a permanent personality quality. In other words, don’t expect to ever meet a human being with this energy in his or her aura who consciously understands its vibration. It just won’t happen.
I don’t think Bardon intends those practicing the cosmic letters to turn into sages and saints. He wants comprehensive, wide ranging skills. He wants individuals who are trained to serve. To do this, they need to be able to respond to any contingency by having a vast range of abilities.
So in a pinch, the magician digs into his resource kit of cosmic letters and pulls out a combination that will resolve the particular problem he is dealing with at the time. Bardon prefers an individual who can be exact and accurate in his response to a problem over an individual who has an abundance of luminosity in his aura but whose perceptions are limited to a narrow band of light.
If you did meet someone who radiated the akashic wisdom of the letter A in his aura, it would not be a human being but a spirit disguised as human or perhaps an individual temporarily overshadowed by a divine spirit. It is hard enough to find spirits who embody this quality much less someone walking around on two legs on our planet.
As I process this state of awareness, I try to view various problems from its point of view so I can better understand it. The universe and human history, as examples, are very violent places. The akashic level of A responds that you have to focus on the beauty that is unfolding. In other words, the A does in fact have a divine point of view: “The beauty of the human soul as it unfolds becomes more dazzling and powerful than a star by far.”
In the akashic zone of the earth, the letter A becomes the wisdom that is underlying and seeking to be perfected in all disciplines—literature, science, technology, biology, medicine, religion, energy, longevity, politics, economics, etc. Where we once were, where we are now, and where we shall be—it offers to reveal the highest understanding of things.
In regard to corrupt political regimes, you could overthrow them with the letter A. But it would not be very quick since this vibration is beyond most people. To inspire and institute justice, you need a vibration that is more dynamic in terms of bringing about change.
Summary: If there is one quality I could focus on that would take me immediately back into the akashic state of awareness belonging to the letter A it would be the thought—“ I am pure boundless light illuminating the universe and everything within it.”
If you manage to get this idea stronger in your consciousness you acquire a power to maintain balance between opposing forces as if you are holding a divine scepter in your hand.
As I have mentioned elsewhere, many mythologies and religions involve a quest to unite with your divine parents. If you succeed in the quest, ultimately, you become a divine parent. Practicing the letter A on the akashic level is a way of accomplishing this.
Three sense concentrations
The air element has the sensation on this level of being a sea of air or a vast sphere of air around you and you are at the center.
The vibration of the sound emphasizes pure mental perception without any interference by the astral or akashic planes. When you want to see what is in front of you and what you are dealing with you want to be able to do so without having to view it from an eternal or timeless level of akasha or have your perceptions colored by astral emotions.
The color of light blue is pure, clear, open, luminous, and self-illuminating almost like a sound of a bell that produces enlightenment.
I once overheard a student ask a guru about his relationship to a woman. The guru replied from the timeless/eternal perspective: “In fifty or sixty years you will both be dead and these kinds of attractions will no longer exist. So just ignore them. They are without inherent meaning.”
Now if the student had come back and put the guru on the spot demanding greater clarity by saying, “That is very nice. But what I am asking you to do is tell me what you actually see when you look at her?”
The guru might have replied, “Oh? You want my mind and not my wisdom? Okay. Looking at her through my psychic perception--this may be news to you--but she has been lost and confused her whole life in spite of her beauty and attraction. She needs an inner illumination but no religion on earth can offer this to her.
“The thing is that she is not like so many other women in your society at this point in history—asserting herself through external activity and following career opportunities do not enable her to grow. She has worked in that way and it does nothing for her.
“You, on the other hand, can provide her with this inner light and clarity of self-understanding; but you would have to form a strong emotional bond with her to do so because this is what she understands and can respond to. I won’t bother you with the details of your past lives’ associations with her because they add nothing to what I have already said.”
Now there is clarity of mental perception without interference from akasha or astral vibrations. Mental clarity will always answer: this is the situation and this is the bottom line when it comes to your options and decisions.
The great advantage of the letter A on the mental plane is that it can think without adopting any line of reasoning or taking a perspective. There are no restrictions placed on it. It is open, clear, and luminous. The mind has no beginning or end.
In terms of mental activity, there is balance and clarity. I have lots of mental activities that are not balanced or clear. The letter A again offers by contrast a state of mind that can weigh all aspects of a problem or situation arriving at an understanding that takes everything into consideration.
It lifts you up so you can think without anxiety, insecurity, confusion, or fear. The letter A balances fire and water, the electric and the magnetic. It keeps them in harmony. If you want to accomplish some goal using will or to love more effectively, you still need to perceive clearly your situation and the nature of the people you are dealing with. Without clarity, movement toward the goal suffers and love is misapplied.
Often in the history of science, a new theory or discovery has to overcome a powerful and rigid tradition of interpretation. It is not just Copernicus and Kepler in astronomy dealing with the church. It is not just John Nash proposing a new fundamental system of economics opposed to Adam Smith.
It is scientists like Donald Stein who found evidence that the brain can grow new cells if treated with progesterone within twenty-four hours of a traumatic brain injury. But his theory goes against the established tradition that says brain cells can not grow back once damaged. So he spends decades and his own money slowly making inroads into the scientific establishment. And now he is quoted in textbooks. He has become the establishment.
But it was not easy. It took courage and intellectual integrity. His method derived from a way of thinking that can look at what is in front of it without having to rush to judgment. It took a way of thinking free of insecurity. It required thinking without regard to its own past intellectual commitments and personal, vested interests. It requires mental perception capable of stopping and thinking about what it actually has instead of what it imagines something already to be.
A magician once appeared to a Western Zen master in his dream. And he said to the master, “You know, I visited your monastery a few times. I saw the students walk in. They walk across the temple floor as if they are walking on thin ice. The sit down silently on the cushions and face the wall. Some are entranced, some are fairly clear in their minds, but none are relaxed.
“They are formal as if they have been invited to a thousand dollar a plate fund raiser and are all dressed up for the occasion because the president will speak. But they are uneasy because they vote for the other political party.
“Your students are struggling and making an effort. But their hearts are not at peace. So if you might convey to me the essence of all you teach and all you have learned down through the years. Take the house which is your monastery and it is gone. Take the cushions and the incense and they are gone. Take the horrible gong your students use and it is really gone. Take the Japanese lineage and tradition and throw it away. Take the koans and get rid of them. Now give it to me in a nutshell what this is all about.”
And the Zen master replies, “You know, I have often had the same thought. And I intended to say it aloud and write it down so there would be no mistake. But when I am awake I just can’t get my mouth to speak. I think because deep down none of my students are ready to hear what I want to say. As you must already know, I can only reveal wisdom when another heart is ready to receive it.
But since you ask, I will answer you question according to your intentions. The essence of my wisdom stripped of all external trappings is this:
Take the perceptions of your five senses,
Your feelings that respond to them,
And your mental activities that process the feelings and the perceptions,
And simply imagine that they occur within and from a state of complete freedom.
Do this and you will have no need of incense, cushion, temple, robe, master or priest ever again.
In essence, to be enlightened is to be free.
When I get the letter A on the mental plane I feel like my mind has become the blue sky. I feel vast, calm, clear, and relaxed.
Summary: The thought that takes me immediately into the mental plane letter A is “my mind is the sky perfectly clear.”
When this becomes stronger your mind feels like it is the actual sky. There is a sense of identity with the sky, with its clarity and vastness.
Note: For an artist’s rendering of the mental and astral planes, see my story at the end of this essay in which I describe my dialogues with the sylph named Parahim.
Three sense concentrations
The air element is more personal. There is a floating sensation like a balloon floating exactly in the center of a room without being disturbed.
This may seem odd but in an airline magazine I read recently there was an ad for a bed that literally floated in the air. It used repelling magnets to keep it suspended about four feet above the floor. It was attached to the floor below by four cords at the corners.
It is expensive. But it is neither your conventional water bed nor is it an air mattress. It is an air bed.
The sound is like a female voice singing with great passion about the feeling of freedom.
The color is a sense that you are able to attune your awareness to anything anywhere through the astral vibration of air. In other words, you can sense what something is. You can feel its vibration.
In terms of love, the astral level of the letter A is very intimate. Its air penetrates right into the heart of one’s opposite and puts into words or gives expression to the deepest feelings. It is like a song being sung or sharing heart to heart.
In other words, a gulf is crossed between opposites not through passion or desire or hunger satiated. Rather the feelings in the other’s heart are a vibration that can be translated through words or art so they are fully shared and communicated. Consequently, the letter A’s astral level heightens telepathy. You sense the vibrations in another’s mind and soul.
[Note: You can do psychic readings on others just using this airy vibration to sense their auras. If you have been developing your ability to perceive and understand the four elements in their many active and passive qualities, you will have a feel for this.
As in, “Ah, here are the two leaders of a nation. Look at that! They use the air element in their auras only for propaganda, as an expression of their blind beliefs, and as a gesture of arrogance. And the air is weak compared to their fire: their entire program depends on domination. They are quite willing to destroy anyone or anything to uphold their belief that they are superior.
“Their fate is not inevitable but there is a high probability that they face imminent destruction. This is because in their presumption in which they consider themselves right and others wrong they completely mistake others intentions toward them.”
With individuals like that the problem is that they have welded their personal identities to a specific religious or ideological system. Their interpretations and judgments are authoritative and rigid. In point of fact, they would rather die than change or negotiate. Their words are the art of deception.
People have the right to face the consequences of their actions. Since many people identify with these two leaders, nothing would be changed by simply removing them. What can be done magically is to inspire this country to move quickly during a time of transition to become a nation that is healthy, balance, and productive. You envision a nation that has good hospitals, education, infrastructure, jobs, economy, and government. Where there is freedom instead of despotism.
To do this you need more than the letter A. You need genuine inspiration that is divine in nature. It too exercises a near divine authority, will, and power. But instead of hatred and domination it inspires justice and freedom. Yet without doubt, the clarity, open mindedness, and wisdom of the letter A are inherent within this will and inspiration.]
The astral level gives great sensitivity and the ability to respond to the uniqueness of the situation you are in. It empowers you feel alive, to be animated and spontaneous.
You feel like a sylph. Like a sylph, imagine that your sensitivity extends for miles through the air element. Imagine being able to feel the wind turbulence made by the wings of any creature that flies from the butterfly to the eagle to the space shuttle. Throw in every kind of wind and weather pattern.
I have known a number of sylphs. They dwell in the sky. They feel very free. They like to keep busy. They are extraordinarily sensitive but they are also very detached.
Back to the human. Now change the air sensitivity into sensitivity to impression, feeling, and expressions of art. The letter A on the astral is incredible sensitivity dancing in every moment surrounded by music and creativity.
Take any moment and its sensory component. Imagine that the way you respond now has something of Steven Spielberg, Beethoven, or Shakespeare present within it or some great poet, painter, actor, musician, stand up comedian, or playwright or all of these at once. There is a change in awareness on the astral plane.
This moment right now becomes a moment in the play Our Town in which the present is view from a point of view of having died and passed on. But now you are looking back and reliving what is long gone. The moment is not ordinary, boring, or mundane. It becomes something to savor as you realize how fragile, wonderful, and beautiful it really is.
I remember the first time I say a play performed. It was a one act play by Tennessee William called Talk to Me Like the Rain and Let Me Listen. It was not real but it was magical. It was emotionally powerful. A few years later, I got some friends together and directed and performed in that play in college.
Art is fascinating in that way: you get to take problems you haven’t figured out how to resolve and express them and in expressing them you share what you have experienced with the world. And there is lightness, irony, humor, and also passion all at the same time—
Later in life at a class reunion, a woman would say to me, “I had a crush on you in high school.” I replied, “Why on earth are you telling me this thirty years later?” And another woman once asked, “Why aren’t we together?” I replied, “Have you forgotten? You abandoned me.”
How do you deal with moments like those? It takes art to capture the moment, process it, illuminate it, liberate it, and then move on with grace and a sense of humor from what is now gone.
Martin Heidegger has this concept of art in which he says a great artist has a simple message that can be expressed through one sentence for all the art he produces in his entire life. For myself, all that I write comes down to the relation between masculine and feminine, between a man and a woman—hidden within lovers is the power that not only determines the destiny of the world; hidden within the sharing of hearts is the celebration of universe.
The above description explains to me why I have at times been so incomprehensibly lonely and why my capacity for ecstasy is so great—I know what love is capable of when you get it right.
The astral plane is not reality. It is a dream. It is dress rehearsal for what shall be. Like a dress rehearsal for a wedding or a play, you want to get it right.
Some directors don’t have their actors rehearse. They want the spontaneity. Others shoot while the actors think they are rehearsing or when they think the cameras are no longer rolling. There is more room for diversity and creativity. Some directors like some actors like to do takes over and over until they know they have it perfect.
Your moment right now nonetheless for astral A is the ghosts of Christmas past, present, and future revealing to you the choices you have made and what choices are still open to you. Unlike the two leaders of that nation I mentioned, if there is any genuine and uncorrupted air element in your aura, you have the opportunity in this moment to change your fate and destiny. Feel the lightness, balance, and harmony of air and then find a path through life that expresses this.
Your present moment is like an enlightened being appearing to you and revealing all that has been and all that shall be in the entire course of human evolution. And then this being says to you, “You can take as much wisdom and knowledge and light as you like back to your present life—its your choice. It only depends on whether you are willing to make enlightenment your friend.” Like the Zen master said, between you and your sensory impressions, your impulses, desires, feelings, and thoughts there is the presence of freedom. Celebrate this freedom in your thoughts and actions!
To repeat, the astral plane is not reality. It is a dream. But this dream and what you feel right now shape what shall be. As Krishna said in the Mahabarata, “All the great battles of life are first fought within your own heart.” He is talking about the astral plane where the actions of the soul are played out.
If you master the four elements in your own aura and on the astral plane, then there will be times when just being who you are shapes the future. Your dreams carry such power that they have already engaged and overcome the conflicts you will one day face. As Krishna said to Arjuna as they stood before their enemies on a battlefield, “I have already defeated all these armies you see arrayed against you.” The outer has already been determined by the inner. The quality of the soul when it shines that bright and clear creates a path through life that shines with its own inner light.
Sometimes in psychology the therapist will have the client write a script that depicts the problem he is trying to resolve. Then the therapist has the client write a new script depicting how he would act if the problem were gone. Then the therapist says, “Now go home and burn your old script. Your homework for the next week is to act out your new script. Treat yourself exactly like you are an actor and this is the script you have been hired to play. Like a great actor, put all your intelligence, your feelings, and your passion into it.”
Every moment we make choices about who we are and what part we are to play. The A on the astral plane is a feeling of freedom (it’s a song of freedom sung with great passion), a lightness that uplifts because it knows it is able to be free of anything that binds it, confines it, weighs it down, or attempts to push it around. It feels balanced, harmonious, even playful, and able to respond with both detachment and sensitivity in the same moment.
Summary: For me, the one idea that takes me into the astral A is the sense that I can feel the vibration of anything as if any individual thing is like a musical instrument and the notes being played are the sounds and songs of life moving through it.
When this is stronger you can sense the energy of anything as if you are the life moving within it.
Three sense concentrations
Air sensation is still weightless but the air around you feels quite substantial and dense.
The sound is like a tuba player playing a note but it manages to feel quite uplifting and light.
The color is like being able to see the movements of the winds in the sky.
As some fish can do in the sea, animals on land, or birds in the air, they can actually perceive faint disturbances or changes in the elements surrounding them—electrical vibrations, scents, trails of heat, sonar, etc.
Your senses become heightened along the lines of being able to feel the wind or the movement of wind through a tree, through a curtain, or in and out of your lungs or someone’s else’s lungs. You are sensitive to things like temperature, humidity, barometric pressure, or changes in electro-magnetic fields. Your chest feels open like the sky or as in the poetry line,
My mind is the sky pure, clear, and open
Its air flows through my chest
Its winds are my breath.
If you met an individual with a strong amount of this physical air element vibration in his or her aura, you might have feelings similar to what the astral plane A produces. You would feel your burdens lifted, like you are floating in the sky. There is a feeling of freedom, of lifting off the ground. Among other things, it is great to have at parties—it is festive, cheering things up adding humor and lightness to the atmosphere.
Some people have a flair for aviation because of the air in their auras on a physical level.
Oh, I have slipped the surly bonds of earth, and danced the skies on laughter silvered wing; … Up, Up the long delirious burning blue I've topped the wind-swept heights with easy grace, where never lark or even eagle flew, and while silent lifting mind I've trod the high untrespassed sanctity of space, put out my hand and touched the face of God. J. G. Magee, Jr.
My mother said my father had to have had angels watching over him. He was one of the best early bush pilots because he was among the few who survived. Flying at night above a storm a hole in the clouds would open up for him right above where he wanted to land so he could fly down. He had Jupiter and Uranus in Aquarius and these influences manifested not as brilliance of mind but as pure luck when it came to flying. He was extraordinarily lucky almost beyond what a human being is permitted. That is one way the air element presents itself on the physical plane in an individual’s aura.
Summary: The one idea here is simple—you feel as if you are floating in the air. When stronger, you feel as if anything that enters the space you are in has also become weightless and is floating.
As with the letter G, the physical enhances and supports the three inner planes.
The Four Planes
The four planes with the letter A have an optimistic outlook. In regard to the future it knows things will work out with harmony and that wisdom will be attained. But it is also conservative—it is not in a hurry to get anywhere. It feels quite balanced in the moment. Its active power comes from gradually neutralizing imbalances or overcoming errors or abuse through knowledge and the introduction of freedom.
It is not fast like lightning or hot like fire. It is not the flashflood of water or the hail of the thunderstorm. It is the clear expanse of the open sky: whether a day is bright with beauty or dark and stormy, the sky remains unchanged. It allows the storm to pass through because part of its job as the sky is to balance hot and cold, moist and dry while itself remaining open, clear, and detached.
Summary: The one idea is that you feel in a state of wisdom, harmony, balance, and clarity. When stronger, you feel that you have the power to manifest these qualities in whatever area you are working on.
And now a story I wrote from what seems like years ago.
THE SYLPH PARAHIM
Parahim is a sylph of high rank who dwells in the sky above the clouds. She is not only beautiful. She has a profound sense of harmony. For Parahim, music and tones are magical. Being in her presence is like sitting beside a harpist whose songs are of passion and peace.
Parahim also has an unusual empathy for certain kinds of human beings. Recall that sylphs by nature are aloof and distant from humanity. They desire neither to possess nor to be possessed. They cherish independence and freedom above the need to conform or to connect.
But Parahim has a sensitivity which extends beyond atmospheric conditions. She is acutely aware of those whose minds are like the sky. This interest of hers is unmistakable. When you concentrate on her, she notices and turns her attention on you. She immediately scrutinizes the strength of your brain waves. Because the air element fosters telepathy, it is easy for sylphs to attune themselves to the vibration of others' thoughts. This is something Parahim does very well.
I draw Parahim's sigil in the air. This is a magical diagram representing a spirit's qualities. Parahim's sigil symbolizes her ability to move freely between the mental vibrations of mind, the astral realms of feeling, and the energies which we perceive as wind, weather, snow, and rain.
Next I pause for a moment and contemplate the source of her inspiration which endows her with beauty and life. I sense that Parahim's highest ideal is the mind that has become pure light, self-existent, autonomous, and without any limitation. But this is not a religious or cultural ideal. Rather, it is simply that Parahim worships the mind, whether human or divine, that can sense the entire atmosphere of the earth. Such a mind, of course, has attained enlightenment and can not be defined or described by any religion, creed, or philosophy.
Parahim enters my room. Walls, windows, and doors do not limit her freedom of movement. She smiles at me in a way no woman has ever done. Her smile reflects the willingness of her soul to stand naked so nothing is hidden. Her openness is part of her creativity--she has many magical songs that penetrate the heart. They are more subtly than wind, breath, or a lover's caress.
With her tones she can trace the course of passion from beginning to end--capturing its dance, its hunger, and its gratification. As she sings she evokes both yearning and the sea of peace in which yearning drowns because she perceives the innermost fibers of your being.
The gaze of her eyes is most remarkable. She can see the haunting desire which arises in an unknown place within your soul. And in the same moment she can sing a note of freedom and release so that you let go into a serenity which satisfies every need. I see clearly how these qualities and abilities exist within her as I touch her aura with my mind.
As we hold hands, our minds reach for each others. Almost immediately she speaks to me. She seems compelled as if captured by a memory. Looking into my eyes, ages of time are dispelled and she is transported into the past which has suddenly become alive.
She tells me a story: "In ancient times, there was a religion on earth which worshiped the sky. The practitioners had taken an oath that for at least on hour every day they would concentrate on the sky allowing no other thought to enter their minds. They sat on balconies, on rocks, by waterfalls, or at the tops of trees just staring at the blue expanse. Their minds were like sponges soaking in the light. They could not get enough of it. If a cloud passed by, they would see the cloud and become the cloud in their minds. But they also continued to concentrate on the sky above the cloud.
"It was at that time that I fell in love with the human race. You can not imagine the joy it gives me to find intelligent beings whose minds are clear, luminous, and self-aware."
Then gazing at me intently Parahim reads a question in my mind. She says, "Your mind conceals a ferocity of will which would trouble the hurricane if it saw you standing in its way. For you the mind is as vast as the sky. It is designed to capture the light of the stars as a poet seeks to capture a woman's beauty and her heart with his enchanting metaphors."
"But the difference is," I point out to her, "that your priests kept their minds luminous and clear day and night. I can only visit you when I am in a meditative trance. The rest of the time I am blind. The affairs and concerns of daily life leave me little time for mystical visions or monastic chanting and meditations. But you dwell within the sacred in each moment--for you, each wind is a note or a song sung within the heart of God."
"My heart has not always been open," she says. "Most of my will and spirit have been developed by associating with human sages and wise men. For example, these priests. As they gazed at the sky, they fell into a trance. Then their minds became a limitless expanse. As they did this, they opened the gates between the realm of sylphs and human evolution.
"It was at that time that I came down and sat next to human beings as they meditated. I learned from them there is no limit to the power of the mind, the amount of light it can contain, or where it may penetrate. During their sacred festivals, they would sit for three days concentrating--their minds joined as one light and one consciousness. It was as if the entire sky was filled with their presence. There was no where a sylph could go--neither into the jet stream, the thunderstorm or whirlwind, nor to the North Pole or into a desert's desolation and not feel that mental emanation."
"And what was that like?" I ask.
"At such times, the inner and outer worlds were joined. The sea of wind and sky was vibrant with dreams of peace and harmony. The air was thick with feelings of honor and nobility from those who are committed to serving the highest light.
"But the peace was not complete. The priests had a secret hunger buried within them. On the outside, they were gentle and kind, in action as innocent as doves. But on the inside, in their hearts, they had the hunger of wolves who celebrate the mystery of life in the sacred rite of devouring another's life. The wolves and the priests believe that through the act of absorbing energy into oneself the heart is joined to the universe.
"When that civilization ended, the lineage of those priests came to an end also. But I believe the sky shines brighter and the human race is more curious and desires to uncover every secret in nature because the illumination in that religion lingers and continues to inspire. The air element was imprinted and still echoes with the vibration of their chants, meditations, and mantras."
"Did any of those ancient priests talk to you as I do?" I ask.
"They could all feel my presence. Many of them could see me. But only two of the high priests paused from the solemn duties of their monastic life to inquire into the nature of my being and the powers I command."
"And what did they learn, if I may ask?"
She says, "Oddly, both priests had a marvelous sense of humor; they were voracious in their curiosity and they were very intelligent. Like you, both knew immediately that to attain understanding of my being they had to become one with me.
"When I first met one of them, he entered a trance which went on for a week in which he did not move his body. During that time, I was the only thing that existed within his awareness--me, that is, and his curiosity. His presence was like a gentle wind flowing and dancing around me. He never uttered a word that entire time. But his silence was itself eloquent--a spell-binding concentration constantly listening to my every mental action as if he were asking:
The way you caused that storm to hold back and then to rain on--how do you do that? And the way the wind obeys your will as if you are the source of its breath and the place where it seeks to rest--how did you acquire this ability? How can you see so far that you can measure the wind's strength and velocity over an entire continent?
And this ease with which you live. It is an unknown bliss and no poet has ever spoken with its voice and no woman has ever worn its fragrance. How can you be at the same time so sensitive, receptive, and vulnerable and yet so incredibly free that you have no need except to dwell in harmony? Who has granted you this gift? What divine mystery does your existence reflect?
"The touch of his mind was always relaxed and light. There was never an instant in which his intent was to interfere. But for all his inquiry, he never asked the right questions. He never asked, `What are your dreams? What passion holds you in its sway?'"
"And the other priest?" I ask. "What was he like?"
She replies, "He was more playful. He liked to tease me. He would say, `Are you whipping the winds into shape today? Are you teaching them to obey the sacred ordinances as I must constantly remind my novice monks not to stray? Or have you been wandering through some mountain chain or tasting the foam where the waves break in some exotic bay?'
"And another time he said, `Sweet thing, presence of delight, child of the sky, what song of enchantment can I play on my flute so that ten thousand years from now you will still remember my name? You will recall the sound of my voice and say, `He shared the secrets of my heart and his love still shines from my face.'
"Later in his life great destruction wrecked havoc on his land and he was appalled at the needless suffering. For years, he and other priests had to flee the invading armies in order to survive. Once for several months he hid in a deep valley framed by tall cliffs which lacked a mountain pass.
"In that place of refuge, he reached out for me. Though he was never tempted to compromise his human limitations, he cherished being able to travel through the realms of fairy and into the higher astral plane. There he would renew himself by entering a place of absolute relaxation.
"He called out to me and I came to visit him. He said, `If you were a mortal woman I would leave the priesthood. I would renounce all vows and man made religions. Your body would be my alter and your heart would be the temple where I worship. To hold a woman like you, to kiss and touch you, to bathe in the luminosity of your soul is a joy the human race will never know until its mind attains liberation and its heart becomes as vast as the sky.
"'Child of the winds, daughter of sacred dreams, I will find you again in another lifetime when I shall have the power of will and the wisdom to call you into the form of a woman. Then our two evolutions will be joined forever and mankind will make beauty, harmony, and the truth of the universe its religion.'"
"The funny thing is," Parahim says, "he was just on the verge of creating a dream in which we could both live."
And then she asks me, "Why are human beings so afraid of feelings? Why do they not hear as I hear the song in every wind? How can you not notice that every note and tone conceal a dream waiting to awaken? When will your race realize breathing is a magical action? And when will you finally learn that consciousness is the light it embraces and it creates?"
"It sounds to me," I reply, "you long for a lover to search for and discover the secrets of your heart. You wish for another to transform you through his art."
"And I will change him forever as well," she says. "But do not get me wrong. I am not discontent. Other sylphs with whom I associate are gentle and kind. But they are mostly busy and preoccupied with weather control. Only a few are haunted, as am I, by the beauty of the sky, the enlightened mind free of limitation, and the mysterious, divine presence which shines within everything that exists."
"Do you still come down to sit and meditate with the human race?" I ask.
Parahim replies, "There are more than a few like you who search for my essence. I am always ready to share who I am with those who quest in search of enlightenment."
"Parahim," I ask, "take me into the dream the ancient priest was unable to enter."
She says, "You must put aside your human nature. Let us become opposite polarities through the power of love and will joined. Let us call the divine into our minds and drink its waters of inspiration. The beauty within unity is the sound of the enlightened mind which all of nature celebrates in the passion that has neither beginning nor end. It is the voice speaking in the center of every heart. It is the stillness drifting through every thought. The five senses and the breath cling to it and yet know it not.
"In my dream, I am above the earth where I can see both dawn and sunset, day and night. I enter the contemplation of the fixed stars. And I watch the earth turning beneath me as if the earth's rotation and the light breaking on the peaks of mountains are the movement of prayer beads in the hands of a goddess. The sun and the moon with their fire and delight are sounds arising within her mantra. And the stars above chart the depths of her heart and yet can not find the still center of her meditation. But she does not meditate alone as a presence unknown. Another shares with her his passion."
And then Parahim turns to me and asks, "Can you give voice to the beauty I see?"
I reply, "When she contemplates the depths of the night, he is the light within her dreams. The longing within her heart is the song his voice sings. Her breath is love joining with his body and joy rising within his soul. And he is the secret desire at the core of her being--the dream of a friend and a lover whose touch empowers her to be one with all things. Together they partake of a cup of wine made from light and all that is divine. In a dream such as this, in a love in which the mind and heart completely join, is the liberation of the world and the enlightenment of mankind."
After we were done meditating together, Parahim says, "Come back another time when you have three hours to sit and meditate with me without distraction. I perceive in you more than the desire to play a flute that haunts the soul with its sweet fragrance. Your quest is for perfect knowledge--truth, freedom, and illumination. To this end, I will show you what it is to wear the body of a sylph and to feel the sky is but a small part of your mind."
A few weeks later I again meet with Parahim. As she appears, almost instantaneously, my mind enters her body. I am astonished and amazed as I enter the astral realm of the sylph. It is like leaping from a high diving board but there is no pool in which to fall, no movement at all. Perhaps this is what the astronauts feel when they are outside the space shuttle--just drifting weightless with the vastness of the earth suspended in space beneath them. But to be in this sylph's body is to be completely still, silent, and quiet. There is no drifting. The weightlessness is a relaxation so great it is beyond the power of mind to define or of imagination to forge an image.
And I am aware of Parahim's mind as well. For her, the forces shaping and determining the course of our lives seem like images appearing in a mirror. We cling to them or flee from them, delighting in them one moment and then hating them the next as if they have the power to shape our feelings and to bless or curse our lives. But for Parahim the mind is both the mirror and the light appearing within it. The mind of a sylph does not lose its spacious openness though storms appear and whirlwinds rage nearby.
In addition to the relaxation and the mental clarity, there is a pure feminine energy which Parahim circulates through my body. How can I explain?
Long ago a woman kissed me goodbye. She put her whole body and soul into that kiss as if it was her wish that when her life was done she would be able to look back and say, "I was never more alive, never more a woman or more fulfilled than in that moment when we kissed."
If I may be so bold, if you will indulge me for a moment, it was as if in that kiss, in that giving, the soul within all women unveiled itself to come forth and to share in that moment of farewell. The free flow of love that defies the restrictions of time and that destroys all that binds us is what it is like to be within the body of this sylph.